I’ve been watching the 6 o’clock television news with my mom ever since I was a really little girl and most of the time, the news isn’t so interesting for someone like me. There’s lots of boring stuff like sports that gets talked about and lots of business things about the mayor and downtown and things like that. I mostly like the weatherman because it’s fun trying to figure out if he’s going to make a big mistake like saying “Hey, it’s going to be really sun shiny tomorrow” and then when tomorrow comes it’s snowing like crazy and you say, “Hey, it’s July! What’s happening?”
Anyway, I think it was on Wednesday, there was this story on the 6 o’clock television news about vandals and they were going around breaking windshields. The police didn’t know who the vandals are yet, but the Police Chief was saying to the viewing audience that if someone sees someone acting suspiciously, they should call 9-1-1 and the police will come out and investigate which is good because no one likes suspicious characters getting away doing suspicious activities in a suspicious place that just happens to be your neighborhood. It sounded like it was very important to the Police Chief that everybody help out the police so they can find the suspicious vandals so yesterday when my mom took me with her grocery shopping, I did my best civic duty and kept my eyes open for suspicious characters doing suspicious activities in a suspicious place.
When we were five or six blocks away from the grocery store, a great big dump truck got in front of my mom’s car and guess what was on the back of it? A great big sign that said: Not responsible for broken windshields. That’s what it said and there was a great big underline under the word NOT.
I looked at my mom and said, “Hey, are you seeing what I’m seeing on that truck?”
“What?” she asked.
“That sign,” I said, and I pointed right at it.
“I see it.”
“Don’t you think that’s suspicious?”
“No. Do you?”
“Because if I was a suspicious character, maybe I would put that on my great big suspicious dump truck to try and trick people into thinking I wasn’t the one breaking windshields, except the sign doesn’t say he doesn’t break them. It says he’s not responsible for broken windshields. You know, kind of like when a politician does something wrong and the reporters put their microphones up close to the politician and then he says, ‘Hey, it’s not my fault‘ and then everybody says the politician isn’t responsible except everybody knows it is, too, his fault. He’s just saying it’s not his fault so people don’t get mad at him.”
Then my mom said, “Missy, the truck is a city truck.”
“Yeah, that’s kind of suspicious, too, don’t you think?” I asked. “If it’s a city truck how come the logo on the door is kind of not all there, and kind of scratched off a lot?”
“It probably needs to be redone,” she said. “Some of those trucks are pretty old, you know.”
“Or maybe a suspicious character scraped it off the door as best he could and if that happened, then it’s suspicious activity and if a suspicious character did that kind of suspicious activity, and then drove it down the street, it would be suspicious activity in a suspicious place!” I told her, hoping she could understand how important this really was. “We need to phone the Police Chief right away. His number is nine one one. I need your cellphone mommy so I can phone him and tell him about the suspicious character that did the suspicious activity and let him know he’s driving the suspicious dump truck down the suspicious road.”
“I think it can wait until I pull over in the parking lot when we get to the grocery store.”
“If you think so,” I said, as I took my notepad out of my coat pocket and dug for my pencil. “But just in case the truck gets away, I’m going to write the license plate number down so we can tell the Police Chief which one to look for, okay?”
And then when we stopped, my mom made me go for the grocery cart and when I got back, I think she already phoned the Police Chief because she held my hand and we went into the store together. I hope the Police Chief caught the suspicious character. And I hope the suspicious character didn’t get away with not being responsible for all the windshields he broke.